The very model of a modern major musical

By Gregory Kohn

PHOTO: Dave Ottalini

Director Kelly O'Connor, the role of Queen Victoria, joins her Pirates cast on closing night.

If someone explained to you the plot of Blair's most recent production, "The Pirates of Penzance," you might wonder why everyone who saw it loved it. Yes, the main character mistakenly became a "pirate" instead of "pilot" because the words sound so alike. But leave it to Director Kelly O'Connor to take a "paper-thin plot," as she calls it, and turn it into an evening full of laughs.

Every school production edits the original play. But Mrs. O'Connor went much further than trimming scenes. Instead, she enlisted the help of her husband, John O'Connor, and Blair student Russell Ottalini to write new verses to Gilbert and Sullivan's famous tongue-twisting "Very Model of a Modern Major General" song. In the new verses, they mentioned everything from Blair teachers to student loans to "No Child Left Behind." My favorites:

I sing like Justin Timberlake and dance as well as Fred Astaire,
I even write the questions for "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?"

I always make a perfect score on HSAs and SATs,
I'm almost capable of understanding the Academies;

I've studied Euro-history from Caesar through to Joan of Arc
And I can name the one Republican who's in Takoma Park.

But perhaps the line that received the best audience response was the Major-General's ironic demand of the pirates: "Where are your ID's!?"

Russell, the talented sophomore who was the Major General, has worked with Mrs. O'Connor in four productions. "It's an amazing experience," he says, halfway through his theatrical career at Blair. "She's strict and demanding, but an excellent director and very respected."

PHOTO: JEFF LAUTENBERGER

Russell Ottalini (Major General Stanley) and Malcolm Foley (Pirate King) "hail poetry" at the end of Act I.

Adam Carey, a sophomore who has been on stage for three of Mrs. O'Connor's productions, details her mindset during rehearsal. "She's very particular," Carey says. "She'll get a vision of how she wants the show to be before the show event starts. She then casts, arranges the set, and directs based on that."

Mrs. O'Connor's reputation has reached the point that Blair fans expect nothing less than top entertainment. Despite the wintry mix of sheet and rain that fell on the March 16 opening night, the Blair auditorium was crowded, and the audience capped off the night with the usual standing ovation.

An English and theatre teacher at Blair for the past decade, Mrs. O'Connor took a year-long sabbatical in 2004 to attend the Shakespeare Institute in Stratford, England, and knock out one of three required years of research for a PhD in Shakespearean costume design.

This also reunited her with the man she would marry, John O'Connor, who she knew from a Shakespeare course in Oxford the summer before. John shares his wife's passion for Shakespeare, and has directed and acted in theatre groups based in Oxford. He also has a number of published books, including one about Shakespearean characters and a series on Shakespeare plays called "Literacy in Context."

Although a renowned scholar, he is not too proud to sit down with high school students and have fun inventing lyrics. "I came up with some ideas," says Russell Ottalini, "but Professor O'Connor did most of it."

"Pirates of Penzance," Mrs. O'Connor's eighth musical, focused much more on singing than last year's dance-filled "Crazy for You." As an operetta, the songs are more complex and more numerous, amounting to a lot of time in the choral room.

The main character, Frederic (played by Diego Ardila), is apprenticed to pirates by mistake, but waits dutifully until his obligation to them was up, predetermined as his twenty-first birthday. Frederic returns to land and falls in love with one of the Major-General's many daughters, Mabel (Karen Biddle). But Frederic is not rid of the pirates. The Pirate King, a wonderful performance by junior Malcolm Foley, reveals that Frederic was born on February 29 and thus is not 21 years old at all, but five. The rest of the story revolves around the struggle between the Major-General's police forces and the pirates.

PHOTO: JEFF LAUTENBERGER

Caitlin Schneiderhan went from pirate to fill in as lead role as nurse with only a couple hours notice.

The musical did not run without mishap. In addition to the poor weather on opening night, so many of the cast members got sick that it was dubbed the "pirate flu." Among the most afflicted, Francesca Blume, who played Frederic's bumbling nurse, lost her voice to a 102 degree fever and was unable to perform in the second of five showings.

Since Mrs. O'Connor does not use understudies, she called junior Caitlin Schneiderhan just hours before the performance and asked her if she could to go from pirate to nurse. "A whirlwind erupted when I got there. So many people helped me out, teaching me the songs and preparing the costumes," Caitlin remembers. Though she required the assistance of the script on stage, Caitlin was a truly impressive replacement. "It was the most nerve-wracking experience of my life. But after the curtain closed, I was tackled with hugs. It was amazing."

Despite everything "Pirates of Penzance" was another tremendous success. Cheers for John Kaluta and his stage crew for a great set, and to Michelle Roberts and her orchestra. Between superb acting, great singing, and a funny script, it kept a large crowd pleased through every show.

And in that crowd was a face you would not expect to be there — Kelly O'Connor, not fretting fitfully behind stage as most directors do, but seated in the audience, confident of her students and enjoying the fruits of her labor.

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